I had a dream about having a baby last night.
It was about literally ‘having’ a baby.
But not in the normal way.
There I am just driving over Belgrade Bridge in Mankato. And I think to myself: “I wish I were pregnant.” Then BAM, I am pregos. Next thought: “I haven’t felt the baby move in a while.” The next thing you know I feel that odd bulging feeling you get when you have a baby inside you. How I went from wishing I was pregnant to a baby moving inside, I don’t know. All I know is it took two seconds.
As I sit there enjoying my baby girl (intuition told me it was a girl) moving in my womb, I realize there is something wrong. I look down and the imprint of a foot is pushing my coat way from my body! I pull over and rip my coat open where I find a baby foot protruding from my belly button.
Yes I said it. MY BELLY BUTTON!!
Not only is this baby’s foot coming out of my belly button, but the rest of her body is coming out too! By this point I am freaking out and covered in gooey stuff. I literally watch as my second born child is born breech style from my midsection. Seconds later she is wrapped in my coat looking at me with huge eyes as I am trembling uncontrollably.
Doing the only sensible thing I can think of, I drive myself to the hospital. Or I thought it was suppose to be a hospital, but it was more like an office. Yep. An office. With cubicles and everything. The even weirder thing is that they are all nurses and doctors. And they are all rushing around.
There I stand hold my newborn. I just stand there not saying anything. Then a male nurse (why I remember that he is male is beyond me) starts rushing towards me. And then I faint.
And wake up. (in my dream)
And the nurses are working on my baby. While I start yelling. ‘She came from my belly.”
The nurse. “We know sweetheart. You’re baby will be just fine.”
“No, not my belly. SHE CAME FROM MY BELLY BUTTON!!!”
The nurse does a double take and pulls my coat off my baby.
“Sweetheart. This isn’t a she. IT’S A BOY!!!”
Then I wake up, for real.
And recall the whole dream over again.
I shake my head and mutter. “I swear it was a girl.”